Allrighty. So some guy in the UK lost his mind and decided to change his name. His original name was David Fearn. He wanted something catchier, so he changed his name to A LISTING OF EVERY SINGLE JAMES BOND FILM EVER MADE. For those of you without these such things memorized, that means the man now goes by: James Dr No From Russia With Love Goldfinger Thunderball You Only Live Twice On Her Majesty's Secret Ser vice Diamonds Are Forever Live And Let Die The Man With The Golden Gun The Spy Who Loved Me Moonraker For Your Eyes Only Octopussy A View To A Kill The Living Daylights Licence To Kill Golden Eye Tomorrow Never Dies TheWorld Is Not Enough Die Another Day Casino Royale Bond. To save time, people will just nickname him "idiot."
PARIS, Sept. 3 (UPI) -- Passengers on a flight from France to Mauritius have filed suit against Air France after musician Bonnie Tyler performed a song at the request of the co-pilot.
The passengers, believed to be Belgian, complained to the airline after the Welsh singer performed part of her 1983 hit "Total Eclipse of the Heart" at the request of the co-pilot, who retired after the flight, The Mail on Sunday reported.
"I was asleep in First Class. The stewardess came and said the co-pilot was retiring. And they asked me would I sing to him. They were having a bit of a party," Tyler said.
The complaining passengers reportedly claimed they were traumatized by the experience and had feared for their safety during the celebration. The complaint eventually escalated into a legal dispute.
An Air France official said: "The claim against Air France, which it completely rejects, is that the celebrations got more and more unruly and came to a climax when Bonnie sang.
"Air France is saying that any suggestion there was anything more than a few slaps on the back for the co-pilot is nonsense, and it completely rejects the claims that the passengers were at any sort of risk."
You can't get hummus without mashing some chickpeas.
Posted at 1:16:58 PM on August 10, 2006
I'm really happy to see that the Daily Show is bringing on a middle eastern correspondent to put everything into perspective. Birth pangs! Yay! Inshallah!
When stupid names are outlawed, only outlaws will have stupid names.
Posted at 1:24:00 PM on July 30, 2006
According to the BBC..."Malaysian authorities have published a list of undesirable titles to prevent parents giving their children names such as Hitler, smelly dog or 007."
Russian President Vlademir Putin is submitting himself to an unprecedented live webcast interview with the Russian people today. Questions were submitted via the internet, with a promise that the most-asked questions would be addressed by the President.
So what do Russians want to know? Are they concerned with the upcoming G8 summit? Russia's decision not to legalize marijuana? Iran's nuclear capabilities? The economy? The price of vodka? Uhhhh... nope.
“What was achieved by your kissing the little boy Nikita on the stomach?” was one question with 14,470 people voting for it to be forwarded to the President.
Mr Putin baffled Russians and Westerners alike last week when he stopped a young boy who was walking through the Kremlin, asked his name (it was Nikita) and then lifted his T-shirt and kissed his stomach. Some political analysts speculate that it was a clumsy attempt to soften Mr Putin’s image with some “baby-kissing” PR moves.
Oh, but here is my FAVORITE part...
The leading question, with 17,066 votes, was would the President use “giant, humanoid war robots” (!?) to defend Russia? The third favourite, with 11,401 votes, was what he thought about the Cthulhu, a giant octopus invented by the novelist H. P. Lovecraft.
Wow. I wish I could say that the only concerns I have about my President were belly kisses, fictional octopuses and war robots...
I didn't believe it was possible, however I guess people really do fall for those Nigerian scams. But hey, I suppose even a prominent millionaire psychiatrist* can have a weakness for politely-if-poorly written, fanciful e-mails from stranger asking to launder money being kept from rebel leaders in Sierra Leone. I mean, it's not like his family's gonna mind, right?
The irony here is that this man is the neuroscientist who became famous by "announcing in 1987 that President Reagan had been suffering from diminished mental ability as early as 1980." With all due respect, maybe he would've been better served worrying more about himself. Just sayin'...
Eyal Zusman (30) and Amitai Sandy (29), graphic artist and publisher of Dimona Comix Publishing, from Tel-Aviv, Israel, have followed the unfolding of the “Muhammad cartoon-gate” events in amazement, until finally they came up with the right answer to all this insanity –– and so they announced today the launch of a new anti-Semitic cartoons contest -– this time drawn by Jews themselves!
“We’ll show the world we can do the best, sharpest, most offensive Jew hating cartoons ever published!” said Sandy “No Iranian will beat us on our home turf!”
Actually this contest is the least stupid thing I've heard of in a while... It's kinda brilliant.
Young lovers in China's largest city, Shanghai, are turning to cosmetic surgery as a Valentine's Day present... Liu Yan, 24, and her 28-year-old boyfriend had matching nose jobs a fortnight before Valentine's Day, China Daily said.
"I suggested it as a way of celebrating our relationship and bringing us closer together with a special kind of bond," the paper quoted Ms Liu as saying. Riiigggghhhht.
If you want to get started doing business in Iraq, the official online resource is apparently Iraqibusinesscenter.org - which oddly enough is owned by Jim Sosnicky. Follow the trail a bit farther to the Baghdad Business Center, and you'll find that it too is owned and operated by the former DJ and very colorful Mr. Sosnicky.
Other interactive Iraqi locations include The Official Website for the Iraqi Government (not updated since September of 2005). This site is owned and maintained (every so often) by the inspired Ekur Services (cool theme song) - a group of Iraqi nationals who moved back to Baghdad to sew up most of the contracts for all the new government websites.
If you want to link up to Iraqi Government Websites, the US Embassy there provides everyone with the grim state of interactive affairs.
In case you missed this landmark anniversary,Crop Circle Connector recently celebrated ten years online of trying to explain why 50% of all crop circles appear in England.
There is speculation here at TotallyStupid that the site itself was designed by aliens.
Nudist Christians Re-Unite with the American Association for Nude Recreation
Posted at 12:06:16 AM on January 6, 2006
Actual Nude Christian!
We heard lots of news this past year about plans for the Christian Nudist Community in Florida called Natura.
Modern day Quaker, Bill Martin recounted last month to TimesOnline that Natura was expelled by the American Association for Nude Recreation in February, 2005, because their (now defunct) website, naturaresports.com was displaying “sexually exploitative material”.
Archive.org provides the "wayback" evidence for these indiscretions (prepare yourself for nude Christian photos!) dating to 2003 - 2004 and 2005 ).
The good news is, that Natura is now reinstated as an official member of the American Association for Nude Recreation, following the release of their new and rather sad one page statement at natura-fellowship.org which simply admits that the group can't have a real web site any more, apparently because even nudists are offended by their belief in showing what nudity and Christianity mixed together actually looks like.
Their lively Yahoo message board lives on however (no photos), but not without controversy. Recent posts include concerns "we are having many persons attempt to become part of the group whose main interest seems to be sexual".
From all the evidence so far, it appears that Christians believing in online nudity (as long as you don't get interested in sex at the same time) may be coming to your town soon.
Kiefer Sutherland, bad driver and drunken killer of Christmas trees
Ok, so it was the early '90s... I was stuck in traffic on Vine Street in Hollywood. The light turned green and I'm just hitting the gas when a black BMW speeds by from the parking lane and cuts me off from the right, forcing me to brake in a complete panic. Wanting to know what kind of &*%$ would do this, I sped up to see none other than a post-Young GunsKiefer Sutherland staring intently ahead from the wheel. And this was before cel phones so it was really just him being a jerk on purpose. Thus began my personal decade of Kiefer-loathing.
But hey, he's redeemed himself lately right? It was a long time ago that he was cutting people off & being dumped by Julia Roberts. He's got a hit show, a family, he's all growed up and mature!
OR MAYBE NOT. Well, unless you call attacking a London hotel's innocent 12 ft. Christmas tree & doing lame breakdance routines whilst undergoing near-alcohol poisoning* with his garage band... uhhh... "mature." And if you do, you're probably rushing Sigma Nu at Arizona State & not a 40-year-old man with 4 kids. Just sayin'.
*And you did this all while hanging out with & hitting on REPORTERS for the London Sunday Mirror!? Ooof, really bad call, dude.
Call me cynical, but I get the vibe this dolphin just marriedher for her money. He looks kinda shifty. Plus he goes by the name of "Cindy"... I mean, talk about a red flag! Wake up, lady!
Who knows, maybe we can look forward to a gorilla wedding sometime soon...
Just in case you missed it, The Reformed Druids of North America just released their year end wrap-up.
Highlights: "Three things in a woman which bring on her the world's disrespect and her husband's hatred: lying long in the morning, being stubborn, and being slattern*." "Three plagues of the wise: women, drink, and bad temper."
Hot Druid News: "The state Game Commission is currently drafting proposed regulations to allow hunters to use the atlatl, a small wooden device used to propel a six-foot dart as fast as 80 mph. The commission could vote to legalize its use as early as January."
"She was in severe pain... Everybody in the prison heard the scream." Terrie England (Lynndie's mother), who is caring for England's infant during her incarceration, faulted prison officials for not giving better treatment during a visit to the emergency room. "They gave her nothing," she said. "When this happened I was furious... To think they give you nothing for pain."
"...at some point, Farris Hassan, a 16-year-old from Florida, realized that traveling to Iraq by himself was not the safest thing he could have done with his Christmas vacation. And he didn't even tell his parents."
I'm sorry, I know he's just a kid, full of ideals... but someone needs to shake this boy silly. And I'm pretty confident they're going to do exactly that the second he gets off of the plane.
Talk about going above & beyond the call of duty to get extra credit for a class...
It does raise the question: Are there any legitimate operations out there willing to turn dead pets into a hat? I for one would like to remember my cat by wearing her.
Mayor Roberto Pereira da Silva, of Biritiba-Mirim, Brazil, came up with the idea because the town's only cemetery is full. He wants to bring in a law that would see relatives of people who die before their time face fines or even jail.
